


Campfire Confessions

by LacePendragon



Category: RWBY
Genre: Angst, During V4E8, Established Relationship, M/M, Mourning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2018-10-31
Packaged: 2019-08-13 21:26:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16480046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LacePendragon/pseuds/LacePendragon
Summary: After the talk around the campfire, Qrow thought all the kids were out cold for the night. Apparently, one of them wasn’t quite asleep yet.





	Campfire Confessions

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written December 31st, 2016. Reposted October 31st, 2018. Happy Halloween.

The crackling of the campfire kept Qrow awake long after he should have been asleep. He stared into the dying embers, tempted to poke the fire but worried that in his current state he’d make it even worse – maybe set one of the sleeping bags on fire. Instead, he dealt with the cool night air on his skin and hoped to hell that he didn’t die of exposure if it started raining.

The pain was coming back, his alcohol was running out, and he was absolutely terrified.

What the hell was he supposed to do now?

“Ah, Jim, I’ve fucked up, haven’t I?” he whispered. He pulled the small silver coin out of his pocket and rolled it over in his fingers. It had been a gift – a good luck charm, James had said – back when he and James had first started dating. Coins had fallen out of use in Remnant ages ago. Metal was better spent on weaponry, ammo, armor, and a thousand other things that required it. Like airships or kingdom defenses. Paper, as easy as it was to make from those weird bamboo plants they made paper from in most places (bar Atlas), didn’t have a lot of other uses, and it made sense to transfer all their money over to it and save metal for things more precious.

But there were still collector coins across Remnant. _Remnants_ , heh, so to speak, of the past. Of simpler times when the world may have been just as bad, but hey, it wasn’t as overt about it.

Times before Qrow had to worry about anything, and only partially because he hadn’t been born yet.

Times before Ozpin had had to move forward so much. Before they’d fallen because of everything shitty in the world. Fuck.

Qrow sighed and rolled the coin over in his fingers, careful not to drop it, lest he lose it. It’d be just his luck. Gods.

He just wanted to stop worrying about that shit for once. Just for one day be good luck and not some idiot who couldn’t even keep his semblance under control.

James had been good for that. Pulling back his semblance so that Qrow could relax. It was part of aura melding, after all.

Qrow missed it.

Qrow missed _him._

He didn’t even know if they’d see each other again.

“Mr. Branwen?” It was Ren, sounding unsure and a little terrified. He sat up across the fire, hugging his legs through his sleeping bag. “Could I ask you a question?”

“Sure, kid,” said Qrow, tucking the coin back in his pocket.

_“Marry me,” James had whispered in his ear when it had all gone to hell._

_“God yes,” Qrow had whispered back._

And that was the last they’d seen of each other. Qrow knew he was alive – it was hard not to, what with him being the general and all.

But that left him wondering if Jim had any idea Qrow was still alive. With his job, assumptions could be made and Qrow, well, Qrow was a little terrified for what that meant for James.

“Do you really have no other obligations?” asked Ren, hugging his knees even more closely. “Are you truly free to follow after a group of teenagers?”

“If I hadn’t, you think Ruby would still be in one piece?” asked Qrow. He spun off the top of his flask and took a deep swig from it. The alcohol blurred his senses, leaving his semblance to flounder as it struggled to latch onto anything, and it also dulled the pain of the cut in his side, which was slowly but surely getting worse and worse as time went on.

It wasn’t healing. His aura wasn’t coming back.

_Truth or semblance?_

He just didn’t know.

“No,” said Ren. “I think you saved her life.” He leaned forward and grabbed a stick, prodding the fire back to life. Qrow sighed and shifted a little closer to it, holding out his hands to capture the warmth. “But… you seem nervous. I can’t help but wonder if you’ve left something behind.”

Qrow sighed and took another swig from his flask. “Everyone lost something when Beacon fell, kid. That’s not unique to me.”

Ren frowned and looked into the fire. He said nothing for a few seconds.

“I don’t think there’s anyone in this world who hasn’t lost someone from all the fighting,” said Ren. He looked up at Qrow, brow furrowed. “If you’ve really seen the worst humanity has to offer, why do you still fight?”

Qrow put the cap back on his flask and leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees. He ignored the pain that shot up through his side. The throb was growing steadily and he knew he was in trouble. He wasn’t sure he cared. His fear numb from pain and alcohol.

“Because I’ve seen the worst humanity has to offer,” said Qrow. He shrugged, a jerky motion as opposed to his usual smooth, and flashed a small, slightly bitter smile at Ren. Crooked, but all his smiles were. “When you see all the crime and hatred, all the fear and bigotry – every nasty thing that humanity is capable of – you either fall into it, or you rise above it.” Qrow shook his head. “I never wanted to fall and maybe I’m not good enough to rise, but I’m gonna try. I can’t believe the world is inherently evil. If I do, then what’s the point of anything?” Another shrug and a sigh.

Ren was silent. He stared at the fire, the reflection of the flames making his pink eyes glitter. Qrow suspected that was partially from tears, but he didn’t say anything. It wasn’t his business.

“I don’t understand you,” said Ren, softly.

“Most people don’t,” said Qrow, his voice dry and his smile wry. “Everyone ‘cept Jim, anyway.”

“Jim?” echoed Ren, furrowing his brow as he looked back up at Qrow from across the fire.

“Ironwood,” corrected Qrow. Right, he forgot sometimes that most people weren’t on a first name basis with the guy. Or did he forget? It was hard to remember. His head was getting light.

“You two are… close?” guessed Ren.

Qrow’s lips twitched and he gave a quiet snort. To Qrow’s left, Ruby stirred for a moment. Both Ren and Qrow watched until she went still again, curling up on her side and snuffling softly in her sleep.

“I should hope so, seeing as he’s technically my fiancé,” said Qrow. He shrugged and shook his flask. There wasn’t much left in it and they were still a ways from the next village. Stress or not, he needed to save it for a painkiller when things got bad.

He didn’t want to make the kids carry him. Nora could probably do it easily, but she was tiny. Wouldn’t be fair to them.

And also, it’d be pretty damn embarrassing.

“Wow,” said Ren, looking more than a touch surprised. Then, he cocked his head, expression going soft. “What do you mean ‘technically’?”

Qrow’s lips twitched. “He proposed to me when all of this went to hell, in the fall.” Qrow shrugged. “Never did get a ring, but we both had to take off pretty fast after…” He looked over to Ruby. “After everything.”

“You’re not going to tell us what happened up there either, are you?” asked Ren. He watched Qrow, but he seemed more resigned than anything else.

“No,” said Qrow. He looked to Ren. “I told you ‘bout the silver eyes. See if you can put it together.”

Ren sighed and tugged at his hair, but he said nothing else about it. Qrow figured, out of the three, Ren had probably put it together the quickest. Ruby had silver eyes, she’d been on top of the tower, and Qrow had told them the details of the power. Ren had probably figured it out just from that. He thought Ren might have explained it to Nora, afterward, and Jaune probably would piece it together once he stopped spitting acid over Qrow.

Not that Qrow really blamed him.

“I’m sorry,” said Ren. Qrow squinted at him, furrowing his brow. “About you and the general. I know something about leaving people behind.” He grimaced. “Not like that, but…”

“I get you,” said Qrow. He cracked a tiny, mostly wobbly, smile at Ren. “Thanks.”

Ren nodded, his gaze slithering away from Qrow and falling to Jaune, who slept on Qrow’s right. Even in the low light of the fire, Qrow could see the way Ren’s expression went quiet and introspective when he looked at Jaune.

“What’s that about?” asked Qrow, gesturing between the two with his mostly empty flask. He swallowed against the pain in his side and told himself he could handle it. He _had_ to handle it. For the kids. “Something between you two?”

Ren jumped, eyes going wide as he looked back at Qrow, mouth falling open. “No!” he said, far too quickly and too loudly. The others shifted and Ren winced, looking away from everyone until they settled again. “No,” said Ren, in a very quiet voice. “No, we’re… we’re friends.”

Qrow hummed and cocked an eyebrow at Ren, a little twist to his lips. “Sure thing, kid.”

Ren scowled and looked back into the fire, poking at it with another stick. “It doesn’t matter what I want, or how I feel, he’s in mourning. He’ll be in mourning for a long, long time, Mr. Branwen.”

“Qrow.”

Ren’s head came up and he furrowed his brow, his frown shifting from angry to confused. “Pardon?”

“Qrow, call me Qrow,” said Qrow. He held at his side and grimaced, shaking his head to drag the fog from his mind. “I’d say Mr. Branwen was my father, but I never knew him. Not really.”

Ren’s expression went soft. “Neither did I,” he whispered. Then, clearing his throat, he said, “He’s mourning.”

“You trying to convince me or yourself?” asked Qrow. Ren didn’t answer. Qrow sighed and leaned toward the fire, trying to warm the chill that was slowly spreading through his body. _Crap._ “Look, kid—”

“Ren,” said Red, in the same voice Qrow had said his own name.

Qrow’s lips twitched in vague amusement. “Ren,” he corrected. “Look, I know what it’s like to want someone you think you can’t have – I fell for the god damn general of Atlas, come on now. _But_ ,” and he hesitated, emphasizing the word, “you never know unless you try.” He looked to Jaune, who slept on. He looked troubled.

Even in sleep, the kid couldn’t relax. Qrow sighed, mostly to himself, shoulders slumping. God, none of them were resting right after all this, were they? Or maybe ever again. And at least half of it was his fault.

“And if I try too early? If I end up a rebound or rejected and break up the team?” asked Ren, raising an eyebrow at Qrow. Qrow opened his mouth, closed it, and shook his head, pressing his lips together to keep from smirking.

“God, we really are the same person,” said Qrow. Ren raised an eyebrow and Qrow continued, “Abandoned as kids – orphaned or else tossed – grew up rough with a girl that’s more your sister than anything else.” Him, literally; Ren, figuratively. “Learn to fight in ways that scare the fuck out of most people, try and keep people around you in check even when you’re breaking down.” He shrugged and cocked an eyebrow at Ren. “And falling for people who are too good for us, thinking we can’t have ‘em.” Ren said nothing. “Stop me when this sounds familiar.”

“Different worlds, similar stories,” murmured Ren, hugging his knees again. “Just because we have some things in common doesn’t mean I’ll turn out the way you did.”

Qrow let out a soft snort, biting his cheek to keep from laughing. “ _God_ , I hope not.” Ren gave him a curious look. “Look, kid, Ren, whatever, if I can make sure none of you end up like me, let me tell you, _I will die happy._ ”

“Oh,” said Ren. He grimaced, staring at the fire. “You really don’t like yourself, do you?”

“Not most days,” said Qrow. He rolled his fingers, checking his range of motion. Fading. Poison? Probably. Not toxic though, else Tyrian wouldn’t have been trying to stab Ruby. He wanted her alive.

Or maybe he just had an anti-venom back wherever the fuck Salem was.

He was screwed.

What else was new?

“You should sleep,” said Qrow, softly. “We’ll talk more tomorrow.”

“Are you going to be okay?” asked Ren.

“Depends on your definition of the word,” said Qrow, drily. Ren gave him a worried look and Qrow sighed, dropping the sarcasm. “I dunno, kid. Guess we’ll find out in the morning.”

Ren nodded. “Goodnight… Qrow.”

“Night, Ren,” replied Qrow. With that, Ren curled back up in his sleeping back and fell asleep within moments, obviously exhausted. Qrow touched his hand to his side, just under his bandages, and, in the dim light of the fire, he saw his fingers come back purple.

He grimaced, pain clouding his head until he could think of little else.

He wondered if he’d survive.

He wondered if he’d see James again.

He wondered if James would even want to see him.

Qrow sighed and slid off the log, shuffling over to a tree, away from the others, to try and sleep.

If he woke up in the morning, he’d tell them the rest of the story and help them out any way he could. Maybe they could fix this, if they acted fast enough.

But that was a pretty big ‘if’.


End file.
